
<p class="wp-block-paragraph">They say the apple doesn&#8217;t fall far from the tree but a tornado must&#8217;ve taken mine for a ride cause I wasn&#8217;t like this. The last couple of days my boys have given me some head-scratching moments. Let me just set the scene.</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Chapter 1: Walker Texas Ranger</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">So, we have a pool its just a cheap above ground pool we got like 5 years ago our yard has alot of trees in it and with work I spend more time scooping out leaves and maintaining it then we do swimming in it. Walker is practically a man now in the sense that he thinks he knows absolutely everything soI&#8217;vee been teaching him some of the maintenance. All my kids absolutely love water especially the two-year-old Lincoln. While we are trying to clean it he&#8217;s just lobbing every toy, float, goggle he can find straight into it in between trying to lemmings walk straight into the pool. So I&#8217;m like hey walker just jump in and get all those toys out then you can swim for a minute, he relishes any chance to get in so just dives right in. Which of course was all the motivation my mini Micheal Phelps Lincoln needs so after the fifteenth time of catching him mid gainer I decide its time to take him to momma. I carry him kicking and screaming back inside. Now I am a very paranoid person I always think worst-case scenarios and always try to be responsible so I&#8217;ve never let walker in the pool unsupervised even for a minute. Let me tell you I opened the door to go back out and he was nowhere to be seen&#8230; Now here&#8217;s something no one ever tells you when you become a parent. You&#8217;re always terrified your kid is dead. I don&#8217;t know how many times I&#8217;ve peeked into his room to make sure he was still breathing while he was asleep. So when I didn&#8217;t see him I immediately thought he was drowning at the bottom of the pool. I yelled Walker! As I scrambled to the pool. He peaks his head up over the other side of the pool in the yard the momentary wave of relief is replaced by puzzled bewilderment. &#8220;What in the world are you doing? ; To which walker matter of factly replies, &#8220;oh I just pooped.&#8221; ; Me in my now stunned bewilderment reply, &#8220;what&#8230;..?.&#8221; ;  ; He goes &#8220;yeah can you get me some toilet paper?&#8221; As his stark white booty now scurries across the deck and dives back into the pool. I slap my face as walkers care free attitude has made me do several times in the past. Oh to be young and blissfully unaware. The world is going to shit and my little man cubs biggest concern is which part of the lawn is the right spot. I guess Im glad hes just one with nature like that but we do live in the middle of the city and Im not looking forward to mowing the grass.</p>


<div class="wp-block-jetpack-rating-star" style="text-align:left" itemprop="reviewRating" itemscope itemtype="http://schema.org/Rating"><p><span aria-hidden="true">â</span></p><span style="display: none;" itemprop="worstRating" content="0.5"><span>
<svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="24" height="24" viewBox="0 0 24 24">
	<path class="" fill="currentColor" stroke="currentColor" d="M12,17.3l6.2,3.7l-1.6-7L22,9.2l-7.2-0.6L12,2L9.2,8.6L2,9.2L7.5,14l-1.6,7L12,17.3z" />
</svg>
</span>
<span>
<svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="24" height="24" viewBox="0 0 24 24">
	<path class="" fill="currentColor" stroke="currentColor" d="M12,17.3l6.2,3.7l-1.6-7L22,9.2l-7.2-0.6L12,2L9.2,8.6L2,9.2L7.5,14l-1.6,7L12,17.3z" />
</svg>
</span></span><span style="display: none;" ><span>
<svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="24" height="24" viewBox="0 0 24 24">
	<path class="is-rating-unfilled" fill="currentColor" stroke="currentColor" d="M12,17.3l6.2,3.7l-1.6-7L22,9.2l-7.2-0.6L12,2L9.2,8.6L2,9.2L7.5,14l-1.6,7L12,17.3z" />
</svg>
</span>
<span>
<svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="24" height="24" viewBox="0 0 24 24">
	<path class="is-rating-unfilled" fill="currentColor" stroke="currentColor" d="M12,17.3l6.2,3.7l-1.6-7L22,9.2l-7.2-0.6L12,2L9.2,8.6L2,9.2L7.5,14l-1.6,7L12,17.3z" />
</svg>
</span></span><span style="display: none;" ><span>
<svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="24" height="24" viewBox="0 0 24 24">
	<path class="is-rating-unfilled" fill="currentColor" stroke="currentColor" d="M12,17.3l6.2,3.7l-1.6-7L22,9.2l-7.2-0.6L12,2L9.2,8.6L2,9.2L7.5,14l-1.6,7L12,17.3z" />
</svg>
</span>
<span>
<svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="24" height="24" viewBox="0 0 24 24">
	<path class="is-rating-unfilled" fill="currentColor" stroke="currentColor" d="M12,17.3l6.2,3.7l-1.6-7L22,9.2l-7.2-0.6L12,2L9.2,8.6L2,9.2L7.5,14l-1.6,7L12,17.3z" />
</svg>
</span></span><span style="display: none;" ><span>
<svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="24" height="24" viewBox="0 0 24 24">
	<path class="is-rating-unfilled" fill="currentColor" stroke="currentColor" d="M12,17.3l6.2,3.7l-1.6-7L22,9.2l-7.2-0.6L12,2L9.2,8.6L2,9.2L7.5,14l-1.6,7L12,17.3z" />
</svg>
</span>
<span>
<svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="24" height="24" viewBox="0 0 24 24">
	<path class="is-rating-unfilled" fill="currentColor" stroke="currentColor" d="M12,17.3l6.2,3.7l-1.6-7L22,9.2l-7.2-0.6L12,2L9.2,8.6L2,9.2L7.5,14l-1.6,7L12,17.3z" />
</svg>
</span></span><span style="display: none;" itemprop="bestRating" content="5"><span>
<svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="24" height="24" viewBox="0 0 24 24">
	<path class="is-rating-unfilled" fill="currentColor" stroke="currentColor" d="M12,17.3l6.2,3.7l-1.6-7L22,9.2l-7.2-0.6L12,2L9.2,8.6L2,9.2L7.5,14l-1.6,7L12,17.3z" />
</svg>
</span>
<span>
<svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="24" height="24" viewBox="0 0 24 24">
	<path class="is-rating-unfilled" fill="currentColor" stroke="currentColor" d="M12,17.3l6.2,3.7l-1.6-7L22,9.2l-7.2-0.6L12,2L9.2,8.6L2,9.2L7.5,14l-1.6,7L12,17.3z" />
</svg>
</span></span><span itemprop="ratingValue" class="screen-reader-text" content="1">Rating: 1 out of 5.</span></div>



<div class="post-navigation-link-next wp-block-post-navigation-link"><a href="https://www.deepbreath.me/this-is-just-a-wtf-moment/" rel="next">Next</a></div>

<div class="post-navigation-link-previous wp-block-post-navigation-link"><a href="https://www.deepbreath.me/four-score-and-ah-hell/" rel="prev">Previous</a></div>